Starting from the very beginning, When we found out I was pregnant with my little girl, my husband and I honestly didn’t believe it (like 8 tests worth of denial lol) and we were beyond ecstatic when we finally realized, we were finally going to be parents! My pregnancy was smooth at first. Light morning sickness, slept amazingly, had the glow, everything was perfect until genetics test. The results came back and instead of waiting for my next appointment, my doctor called us in for an urgent consultation appointment. We never even heard of Edwards syndrome until he broke the news and gave us all of the possibilities of what may happen to our little girl that was “not compatible for life”. We were heart broken but despite everyone’s suggestions, we decided to do all that we could for her.
We traveled every month to San Antonio, TX to our high risk doctor, I worked from home so I could rest, I did the light exercises that were recommended to me, I took my prenatals at the exact time every day. We even told our families not to buy baby furniture because we knew that most t-18 babies are in the NICU for a while after being born and that if we needed their help later on for gas to and from San Antonio or for Amelia’s surgeries, that we would need their help then. They of course didn’t listen. Gifts flooded in and it hurt because although hopeful, we stayed realistic. We knew she wouldn’t be like the other babies. We knew she would need special things to help her… and honestly everything seemed okay until the last couple of days when I started getting an overwhelming feeling like something was wrong. I even got a check up at my OB and I still couldn’t shake it. I mean honestly, Despite the T-18, Amelia was such an active baby. Always rolling or kicking me but the last 3 days of my pregnancy, she rarely moved. I was worried because I did my research. I knew the percentages and the possibilities but the doctors said she was okay considering her condition.
The day before she passed, we had an appointment for an extensive ultrasound that showed our High risk doctor that her heart wasn’t pumping the blood in the right direction due to PDA (Patent ductus arteriosus) so we needed to travel to San Antonio immediately so they could perform an emergency c section and bring her straight to surgery (our hospital wasn’t equip for the surgeries she was going to need). We left the doctors office and it just hit me. I’m not sure if it was mother’s intuition or what but I just broke down. I knew in that instant that my baby was gone. I left the office and called my OBGYN and went straight to the hospital he was in. It felt like time froze when he told me that her heart had stopped. They admitted me and begin the medicines that initiate the labor process. I didn’t get the epidural. I didn’t have my family aside from my husbabd (my father was on his way but it was a 17 hour drive from my home town) I delivered her at 5:40 am on May 4th after 16 hours of labor. She was 1 lb 3 oz and The most beautiful human being I’ve ever seen in my entire life. My doctor arranged for a priest to come in and bless her body. We prayed over her and gave her our kisses goodbye and the hospital took her away. Last year on what would’ve been her first birthday, my husband surprised me with a cupcake with the letter “A” on it with a single candle and we decided that will be our tradition for her every year…Although the pain will never go away, I’m thankful that we’ve been blessed with our beautifully strong little angel and our love for her will never lessen.
Photo below is her christening gown the priest blessed her in as well as her tiny foot prints